Struggling

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82966173 © creativecommonsstockphotos | Dreamstime.com

Just a couple of weeks ago I was feeling hopeful and wanting to write, but my depression is back and I am struggling to make it through each day without alcohol. The alcohol withdrawal is part of my depression, but things going on in my home life are part of the problem too. I'm not going to into details about that because they are just too depressing to talk about. 

I've been struggling with alcoholism for several years. It's a disease that runs in my family and I always feared that I would suffer from it. I fought it for a long time when I was younger, but as depression and dealing with teenagers doing bad things over took my life, I went to alcohol for relief. 

I'm going to start seeing my therapist again next week and hopefully she can help me get out of the funk that I'm in. I used to see her earlier in the year and she was wonderful. She helped me get to a happy place and hopefully she can help me find it again. 

As a result of my struggles with depression and life, I 've decided to give up on the College Hill series. It's not selling well and no one is reading the Kindle Vella episodes, so I'm going to let that go. I've really been struggling to write it and I just don't feel like I want to continue with the story. 

I am going to work on Ridgway Moon, but it will not be on Kindle Vella, and it will probably not end up being a romance. 

I tried to start a new story, but it crashed and burned before it even got going and I know it's because I'm struggling so much with my day to day life. I'm not saying I'm going to stop writing, but I going to stop trying to force myself to produce what I think everyone wants me to write. I'm going to just let my words flow and see where they go. 


 

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